This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
