My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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