when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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