My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I look excited, but its just a facade.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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