i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
