Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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