who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
