You smell like a Billy Joel song
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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