Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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