Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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