i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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