Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
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