Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
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