i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
