Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
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