I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
