I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Randomize
