in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Come back. Shots need mouths.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
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