oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Everclear isn't food dammit
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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