this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
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