the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
