: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
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