my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I think my vagina is haunted
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
