It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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