last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
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