i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Randomize
