Kiss
Puke
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
