no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Randomize
