Have you finally orgasmed yet?
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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