Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
