? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
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