On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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