Who did Billy Mays play for?
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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