Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
then he tried to convert me to islam
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
