that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
they're like a gay fantastic four
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
