Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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