Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
