Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
