He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
