I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
