Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize