Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Still dying that you shit outside
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
