I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
