1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
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