He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Every concussion has its silver lining
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
