Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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