Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
