wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
