i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
