My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
wow bdsm is so cute
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