This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Is Oprah even human
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
